Because Every Day Should Be Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner. And before you start getting anxious about the perfect gift to prove your love to your significant other, you might want to read the first in a little series about love and marriage.

I am calling it,  “Because Every Day Should Be Valentine’s Day”

I reached out to 3 of my friends that I know to have pretty happy marriages. Their relationships have stood the test of time.  Through the ups and downs of life, they have all been resilient in their love for one other. I have taken something from each of their marriages over my years of knowing them and used them as examples in  my own marriage.  I thought I would share their wonderful bits of advice.

For the next few Sundays, you will meet some couples that inspire everyone around  them with their commitment to one another.

I sent them a list of questions to answer so I could share their secrets with my Livin’ Sassy readers. I asked them to answer them separately and not show each other before sending them to me.

Our first couple is Sherry and Charlie. I first met Sherry around 1989 when I took her place as a loan officer at a credit union. I would later rent their house and get to know them a whole lot more.  You won’t find a better example of being opposite personalities but somehow making it work.  Their humor can’t be any more evident than in their annual Christmas letter. It always brings tears to my eyes from laughter with the antics they endure from being polar opposites. Embracing their differences is an understatement for these two.

Allow me to introduce you to one fantastic couple.

The answers to Charlie’s questions:

How long have you been married?   30 years and 5 months.

How did you meet?  Her brother introduced us.

Do you remember your first kiss?  Yes and it was nice.

What would you tell a couple right before they are getting ready to walk down the aisle?

Make time for each other. Always talk things through and never be too busy to listen to the other person.

How do you keep the spark alive with work, kids and all the other stresses of life?

Do the small things. Hold hands and make time together.

What do you admire most about your spouse?  

Her ethics.

What is the most romantic thing you have ever done for one another?

We hold hands every morning that we are together just to let the other know we are there for them.

What one piece of advice can you share with our Livin’ Sassy readers that has helped your marriage stay pretty happy after all these years?

Respect for each other and always asking the other to join in no matter what it is that person is doing.

And now Sherry’s answers which are longer because we all know the woman is inclined to elaborate more!

How did you meet?  My brother introduced us in a local tavern in my home town.  He and Charlie played pool on the tavern’s team and had gotten to know each other.  I was home from school nursing a broken heart from a college romance.  On our first date, I told him I was not looking for a relationship, and he told me pretty much the same thing!   Who knew?

Do you remember your first kiss?  I do, but I never kiss and tell!

What would you tell a couple right before they are getting ready to walk down the aisle?  Making a marriage work is not easy and requires a lot of effort from both partners, but it is well worth the rewards!    You will fall in and out of the warm fuzzy love many times during the years, so say “I love you” every day, even if you don’t particularly like the other person at the moment.  It is important to let each other know they are loved.  (Oh, and for the groom, there will be no further need for you to make any decisions.)

How do you keep the spark alive with work, kids and all the other stresses of life?  Now this kinda goes to that whole “I don’t kiss and tell” thing, but aside from “that stuff”, we always make time for each other.  We grocery shop together, and we make dinner together.  It truly is the little things.  The thing we most enjoy doing together is having at least our first cup of coffee in the morning sitting in bed holding hands.  Sometimes we solve the problems of the world and other times we don’t say a word.  After all this time, when he holds my hand, my heart skips a beat.

What do you admire most about your spouse?  His integrity (and the way he rocked the white tux and patent leather shoes at our wedding!)

What is the most romantic thing you have ever done for one another?  I don’t think there’s one big romantic thing I’ve done for Charlie.  I just try to do little things to let him know he’s still the one, so I put a love note in his lunch every day.  Sometimes they’re silly and sometimes they’re serious, but each one tells him I am thinking of him.

What one piece of advice can you share with our Livin’ Sassy readers that has helped your marriage stay pretty happy after all these years?

Jealousy is a waste of energy.  There will always be someone who catches your eye, and  it’s perfectly okay to read the menu, just don’t order from it.

(and now that we’re a little older …. hearing aids with on/off switches!)

I told you they were fun!

Stay Sassy Y’all.